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Buddy Up/Transcript
opens with the title card song, followed by a lesson on the blackboard on how to get your license revoked Hank: A-and, that's why I can only drive to and from school. In other news, today is our field trip to the Dinosaur Museum! newspaper reading "Mufflin's class goes dino" but Kyle cheer Hank: Now, in light of what happened on last month's field trip to the glue factory... is glued to various school supplies Fankylechum: I blame myself, for straying from the group. Hank: We will be instituting a Buddy System for safety. come forward and blow whistles Fanboy and Chum Chum: BUDDY SYSTEM IN EFFECT! BEST BUDS! BUDDY...UP! but Kyle rush to the front of the room. Kyle just stays where he is, wimpering while the other kids choose their buddies. F&C come toward him Fanboy and Chum Chum: Hey, Kyle! pause Fanboy: Ooh, you don't have a buddy, huh? Kyle: Of course, I have a buddy. He's right, uh...uh... scans the line of buddies then stops on Chuggy Chris Chuggy: Wha -- cactus Wah-wah. Chum Chum: Don't worry, Kyle. We'll be your buddies. blow whistles Kyle: AAAHHH! Fanboy and Chum Chum: BUDDY UP! Fanboy: ROLL CALL! CHUM CHUM! Chum Chum: HERE! FANBOY? Fanboy: HERE! KYLE! Kyle: What are you thimble-wits doing? Fanboy: THE BUDDY CHECK! THE MOST IMPORTANT PART OF THE BUDDY SYSTEM! Chum Chum: THIS DRILL CAN SAVE YOUR LIFE! Fanboy FANBOY, HAS KYLE CHECKED IN YET? Fanboy: NOT YET! WE'RE GONNA HAVE TO SOUND THE ALARM! turns on an alarm which makes the lights go out, but the searchlight doesn't see Kyle Kyle: I'm right here, you idiots!! searchlight sees Kyle and the lights go back to normal Fanboy: All right, Buddy Check completed. All buddies present and accounted for. Chum Chum: You gave us quite a scare there, Kyle. Kyle: I have agreed to be your field trip buddy out of sheer desperation. But I refuse to be part of your ridiculous "Buddies System". Fanboy: Oh, Kyle, Kyle, Kyle. Chum Chum: Kyle, Kyle, Kyle, Kyle, Kyle, Kyle. Fanboy and Chum Chum: inhale Kyle, Kyle, Kyle, Kyle... Kyle: What?! Fanboy: We were like you once. "Oh, psh, it's a field trip. Who needs a buddy? We're big boys, we can take care of ourselves." Oh, how naive we were... to F&C younger Baby Chum Chum: Field trips are fun. Baby Fanboy: And safe. Baby Chum Chum: I'm just gonna wander over here, all by myself, and toss a penny into the wishing well. Baby Fanboy: I'll just stray over here and watch this fluffy cloud. Oh, that one's shaped like a giant hammer. Chum Chum drops a coin into the wishing well and a bear comes out, attacking him. Baby Fanboy is also attacked by the hammer cloud of flashback Chum Chum: And that's how I lost...THIS! toy hook Kyle: gasps Huh?!? Chum Chum: My toy hook hand! I had to wrestle that bear for an hour to get it back! Fanboy: Think about it, Kyle. How many toy body parts can you afford to lose? looks at them, then... Kyle: the camera Let's just get on the bus. Hank is driving the bus through the desert Hank: chuckling the back, F&C have walkie talkies Fanboy: Purple Rain to Orange Julius, what's your 20? Over. Chum Chum: Orange Julius to Purple Rain, I read you loud and clear, I am currently on the bus. Brace-face, do you read? What's your 20? Kyle: Oh, I don't know. I think I'm... to reveal him sitting between F&C Right here between you! Fanboy: pause No need to shout. We're right here with you. Do you copy? Kyle: flatly Yes, I understand you perfectly. Fanboy: Please use the proper terminology. Kyle: Uhhhh! 10-4. Chum Chum: 10-4 what? Kyle: 10-4...Good...Buddy. Fanboy: Ah, Rodger that. Good to have you back with us. put the walkie talkies away Kyle: pause That does it! I'm changing my seat. to stand up but can't Wha -- why are we tied together? Fanboy: Because we only have one parachute! Kyle: pause Oh, this is ridiculous! I'm detaching myself from you two cretins immediately! a cord Chum Chum: Wait! That's not the Buddy Cord! fly out of the bus into the desert on the parachute Fanboy/Chum Chum/Kyle: Whoa! land Fanboy: That was the ripcord. Kyle: You don't -- say. gasp THE BUS! bus leaves without them while F&C wave Kyle: Now look what you've done! We're stranded in the middle of the desert! Fanboy and Chum Chum: With our buddies! Kyle: But, we're hopelessly lost! Fanboy and Chum Chum: With our -- Fanboy: Wait. Do we have our buddies? blow whistles Fanboy and Chum Chum: BUDDY UP! Fanboy: ROLL CALL! CHUM CHUM! Chum Chum: HERE! FANBOY! Fanboy: HERE! KYLE! Kyle: pause I detest you. Chum Chum: Kyle's here! We're good! Fanboy: Oh, thank goodness. For a second I was worried. vultures Hey, look! Vultures! Chum Chum: I bet they know where the food is! Let's follow them. walk under the vultures in circles saying "ahh" for several seconds Kyle: his head Oh, I've gotta get away from these dingbats. As long as they can see you, they'll follow you. Hmm... out wand Makemeus Invisiblis! invisible Now, to tiptoe away... a few steps Chum Chum: BUDDY ALERT! BUDDY ALERT! Fanboy: Where's Kyle? Chum Chum: Kyle's footprints and gasps I found his last set of tracks! He must have stopped here! Fanboy: Send out the Buddy Flare! Chum hits the invisible Kyle with a flare Kyle: Ahh! Fanboy: Nothing! Use the Buddy Pole! Chum Chum: out a pole Kyle! If you can hear us, GRAB THE POLE! Kyle Kyle: Ahh! Ooh! Eh! Chum Chum: It's not working! pole onto Kyle Kyle: Unh! Fanboy: Fling the Buddy Acid! Chum opens a flask of acid and is about to throw it when Kyle turns visible Kyle: Here! I'm here! Chum Chum: Oh, thank goodness! Because.... sigh blows a whistle while Kyle screams Fanboy: BUDDY UP! acid spills all over Kyle Kyle: Ahh! body disintegrates into pieces later. It is hotter than before as the main 3 lie on the ground Kyle: Oh, what are we going to do? There's no way out of here! pause Wait a minute. Why didn't I think of this before? I'll just use my wand and zap us all out of here! to find wand Where did my wand go? Fanboy, holding Kyle's wand. Fanboy is grunting and giggling like a caveman while Kyle makes a disgusted face Chum Chum: Oh, boy. Fanboy turned into a caveman. Happens every time he gets too much sun. breaks Kyle's wand Kyle: My wand! This isn't happening, I must be delirious! gestures to Kyle to sniff his hand Kyle: Oh, no! I'm not smelling your hand! growls Kyle: Oh, fine. One sniff. Fanboy's hand OHH! retches giggles Kyle: Chum Chum, do something to control this cretinous cro-magnon. Chum is turned into a caveman, too Chum Chum: Bud-dy. Bud-dy. Buddy, buddy. begin babbling to Kyle Kyle: Stop it, you two! Focus! We've got to work on getting -- Fanboy hits Kyle's head with a club, knocking him out Fanboy: Buddybuddy. Chum Chum: Ooh, buddy. Fanboy: Buddybuddy. Buddy. Buddybuddy -- Chum hits Fanboy's head with a club, knocking him out Chum Chum: Buddy, buddy, buddybuddy, buddybuddybuddy -- Chum Chum gets hit with a club wakes up Kyle: Huh? What? Wait a minute...if Fanboy's dragging me...and Chum Chum's dragging him...then, what's dragging Chum Chum? a dinosaur dragging them D-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-DINOSAUR! Fanboy/Chum Chum/Kyle: scream Kyle: F&C to the dinosaur Here! runs dinosaur chases Kyle and corners him at a cliff Kyle: Help! Help! Somebody help me! Huh. the dinosaur's mouth watering Oh, I guess this is the end. walkie talkie This is Kyle Bloodworth-Thomason signing off. 10-4, Good Buddy? shifts to Fanboy and Chum Chum, who heard the message. They babble. BONK! They hit their heads, returning to normal Fanboy: Kyle! You got Fanboy. Kyle: the walkie talkie HELLLLLLLP!!!!! Fanboy: Buddy Alert! Buddy Alert! Chum Chum: Our buddy's in danger! jump into the walkie talkie to Kyle Fanboy and Chum Chum: the walkie talkie BUDDY UP! jump out of the walkie talkie We're here! dinosaur roars saliva in their faces Kyle: Oh, thank goodness. How do we get out of this? What's the plan?!? Chum Chum: Huh? Uh, there's no plan. We're just here for our buddy. Kyle: So, we have no way of escaping from this beast? Fanboy: Looks like we're gettin' eaten! Fanboy and Chum Chum: As...buddies! dinosaur roars once more Chum Chum: What do you say to one last Buddy Up? Kyle: sobs Oh, why not? If I must perish, I can't think of two more deserving people to perish with me! Chum Chum: Aww, that's so sweet. takes out a whistle and blows it Kyle: Buddy...Up. main 3 raise their hands high and hold them tightly. Suddenly, the dinosaur holds their hands as well Fanboy/Chum Chum/Kyle: Huh? Chum Chum: The dinosaur wants to be our buddy, too! Dinosaur: growls Buddy? Fanboy: See? We told you the Buddy System could save your life! Chum Chum: talk chattering Who's a good dinosaur? all laugh together as the dinosaur stomps happily, which suddenly breaks the cliff they're on Fanboy/Chum Chum/Kyle: Uh-oh... cliff breaks Dinosaur: Uh-oh... fall and scream to the bus. Hank is driving everyone home Hank: Pssh. Those museum dinosaurs were nothin' but bones. I wanted to see a dinosaur with a little moxie. You know, like that big one fallin' out of the sky towards us right now -- AHHHH! main 3 and the dinosaur are falling towards the bus CRASH! Dinosaur: Uh-oh. at dusk... Hank: Field trip's over. Time to hit the road! Is everyone here? to reveal everyone on the dinosaur's back Everyone: Yeah! blow whistles one final time Fanboy and Chum Chum: BUDDY UP! Everyone: BUDDY UP! is heard. The dinosaur opens his mouth to reveal Kyle Kyle: Can't I ride on the back of the dinosaur like everyone else?! Fanboy: Ah-dat-dat-dat! Stay with your buddy, Kyle. reaches up to the roof of the dinosar's mouth and pulls down a skull head Kyle: gasps dinosaur closes his mouth Kyle: Urg! dinosaur walks everyone home into the sunset Category:Transcripts